Thursday, March 22, 2018


Is your soul dirty,
Cleanse it with a tide cap,
(Can't believe kids are actually eating them.)
If the truth will set you free,
think a lot of politicians would be locked up
There's a Stairway to Heaven,
A Highway to Hell,
Gurus driving Rolls Royces on the Highway

Saturday, January 27, 2018


     Imagine a world in which all politicians are mimes. 
     Imagine a debate between two politicians that has gone bad and they both start using finger gestures.
     After their debate there is no applause, because it is impolite to applaud after a mime's performance.   

Sunday, January 7, 2018


A Quiet Whisper Of Hope
A Faint Echo Of The Past?
Or A Future Where Fate Will Cope?
The Mold Has Been Cast
The Shadow Of Time
The Light Of Day
The Truth of Knowledge
In The Fog Of Despair
People Staring At Their Smart Phones
Living Their Life On The Internet
Always Updating When They Should Be  Rebooting

Friday, December 22, 2017

. - or 0 1

Morse code was in dots and dashes.  Computer code is written in 0 and 1 s.  Simplicity used to convey words, thoughts and ideas.  Yet  government legal documents are now so complexly written that only a skilled lawyer can know the meaning and ramifications of that document.  The documents that were written by our founding fathers' such as our Constitution and Bill of Rights were worded so everyone could understand them.
I have read that our Federal Income Tax code is 10,000 pages long.  I hope our new tax code is more simplified.  

Monday, May 23, 2016


     I believe I lost it somewhere at Walmart.  When I went to the Customer Service Department to report it missing they asked me to describe it.  I said "It was grayish about the size of a naval orange maybe a bit smaller.  They looked and returned and said "No nothing like that was there."
    So  I constantly wander aimlessly in the store trying to find it.
    I did notice that there were a lot of people who appeared to be looking for their's also.

Tuesday, November 3, 2015

Ambiguous Rhetorical Floating Thoughts - a thought

Ambiguous rhetorical floating thoughts
Much like stars thousands of light years away
The light we see from them occurred long ago
But just now have made their presence known
As they have traveled long distances
They have been warped by external forces
Bent, compressed, and expanded
Now no longer resemble their original form
Thus it is useless to try to comprehend them
All we can do is speculate
Thoughts like clouds floating in the sky
Moving ever shape shifting like
Ambiguous Rhetorical Floating Thoughts

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Full Movie Review - The Ladykillers (NEVERMORE)

The movie "Ladykillers" is dark comedy filled with symbolism and irony.  A reoccurring scene takes place on a bridge over a river while a tugboat is towing garbage barges  headed to an island of garbage.  Each time the appropriate music plays  "Come Let Us Go Back To Jesus".  It ends ironically on the bridge with the lead and sole surviving criminal a learned man who likes to recite Edgar Allen Poe and it is a Raven that causes his death and fall into one of the garbage barges while the music plays.
The movie reviews for this movie are low rated because other than the main thief the other thieves are dumb and dumber and aside from a lot of fowl language it is worth watching.

Sunday, July 12, 2015

Not So Mad Max - Tranquil Road

The post world war three is now 30 years past..  The few survivors ride hopped up solar powered vehicles.  The not so bad bad guys are called SMOKERS because they smoke pot.  Most of the time they just mellow out, but then comes the munchies which cause them to crave food.  They bust into all you can eat restaurants from which they have been barred and precede to eat all the food in sight.
The All YouCan Eat Restaurant Owners have hired JUICERS, alcoholic drunks to protect their businesses.
The result is confrontations between the Juicers who are usually falling down drunk and the and the Smokers who are usually higher than kites.
Later in the movie there is negotiations between the Smokers and the Juicers resulting in them drinking and smoking together.  The Smokers doing some drinking and the Juicers doing some smoking.  A truce is signed and they unite forces, now drinking all the alcohol around and and eating all the food around.

Saturday, July 4, 2015

Movie Review - Mad Max Fury Road

"Mad Max Fury Road" is like watching a continuous fireworks finale, a non stop action movie.  It is bound to win academy awards for cinematography and cool looking hopped up cars and trucks and one band wagon truck with 4 huge drums on one side and on the other side a guitar player with a flaming guitar and about 60 amplified speakers and about 12 loud speaker horns. This movie has an endless stream of car crashes and explosions.  There is no phony computer generated imagery, it's all real.  They custom built over 100 cool looking vehicles and all were destroyed in the movie except one.
It's main villain looks a lot like Darth Vader,  Then there's some other enemy's vehicles that all look like porcupines.  Later the main characters are attacked by vehicles that have tall upright flexible poles with Cirque du Soleil like performers atop the poles.
Although the script is written in order to keep the action scenes almost constantly happening, there is a good ending to the film.

Monday, May 18, 2015

Time Casts No Shadows

An observation by "Jimmywrites" blogauthor (Jim Anders)
I was going to write a story after I stole the Title,  about Time or Shadows, but I got nothing.  Other than Time Casts No Thoughts.

Thursday, March 5, 2015


The vortex whirled dizzily around him while he sped forward at an incredible speed.  He had been walking alone in the desert when he was enveloped in what seemed to be an electrically charged tornado.  But it wasn't a tornado but a time space continuum warp.  A TSCW, someone on AJV17364 (as it was known by the Earth astronomers), had caused this to happen by entering conflicting software programs into their computer.
The charged vortex appeared next to the offending computer, and it's operator was awed by it's appearance, then the tumbling Earthling.
Dazed and confused Mark the Earthling, stood shakily up and said "Damn that's the last time I smoke any of that shit."  (Thinking this was an hallucination.)
Jovan the computer operator asked "Who are you?, but all Mark heard was gibberish.
After a while Mark looked around the room, everything was strange including Jovan, but clear and in focus, then he realized this is not an hallucination, but reality.
He went to school there learned their language and became an immigrant there.
He now works there as a landscaper.

Monday, November 24, 2014

Alternate Realities

  In the beginning there was darkness. Then the universe was illuminated by multi colored strobe lights and  music began to play  "Stairway to Heaven"
                              Billions of Years Later in the Town of Hobokin 
      The Huns played the Vikings in a game of football. Just wearing their normal town sacking clothes and penalties were never called because there were no referees. .  (The game was sponsored by Capital One)
       In a nearby tavern frequented by bicycle gangs wearing spandex and fanny packs the discussion between rival bike club members escalated to an argument and then a slapping face fight.
       At the town square, two tribal leaders met to settle a  territorial dispute.  Chief "Running Amuck Enigma" a wise old man had been chosen to sit in the seat of judgement.  He held the golden rubix cube in his right hand , the symbol of his authority.  He listened patiently while the two men presented their opposing views, after about an hour he motioned with his hands for them to stop talking then motioned for them to approach .  They did and he yelled out to one "Your a moron" and struck him in the head with his rubix then signed the judgement papers and handed them to the other man.
     Captain Kirk had witnessed all these town events.  Standing on the street he touched his communicator badge and said "Beam me up Scotty, there's no intelligent life here."

Thursday, September 4, 2014

Kung Foo

Grasshopper, learn to walk on ricepaper without leaving a trace.  Learn meditation, the truth and martial arts.  Then with your forearms lift a large heavy burning hot metal sculptured vase.  Then and only then will you have your own hour long tv program, in which the first half everyone will beat you up, but in the second half you will beat everyone up.

Sunday, May 11, 2014

The Gates of Sodom & Gomorrah

The large parking lot by the entrance to Sodom & Gomorrah was almost totally filled.  Everywhere there were Maseratis , Lamborghinis, Mecedes-Benzs, BMWs, & Porsches.  I found a parking spot and parked my cheap compact car a few blocks away from the gate.  A guard stood outside the small guard shack by the gate with a clip board in his hand and an old walkie talkie clipped on his belt. I approached and heard music and laughter, there was a party going on inside.  He asked my name, I told him and he checked his clip board and told me my name wasn't on his list,so he couldn't let me in.
I walked back to my car and drove away to the nearest Mac Donald's, parked, went inside and got in line.  Life is simpler there all you have to do is say a number and they give you food.

Friday, April 4, 2014

Short Movie Review - Captain Phillips

"Captain Phillips" is a slow paced true life story.  The most memorable line in the movie is when the pirate boss points to his own eyes and says "Look at my eyes." to captain Phillips.  When you look at him is all you noticed is how yellow his teeth are.  Guess he is used of people staring at his teeth.

Thursday, April 3, 2014

The Inner Sanctum

The world play progressed smoothly as the many puppeteers pulled everyone's strings.  In the auditorium the seats were all empty except for a few people shouting out commands to all the puppeteers.  They were some of the Inner Sanctum and only their group knew the whole story.  However, they could rewrite the script at any time and change the story.
Many thought that the people who pulled the strings controlled the world's destiny, but that was exactly what the Inner Sanctum wanted them to think.  The puppeteers all had bluetooth cellphone earpieces so that the rest of the Inner Sanctum members not present could also control the world's story script.
Someone once said "All the world is a stage and we are all but actors."  Which is true for everyone except the privileged few who make up the Inner Sanctum and their many puppeteers
.Entertaining Talented Puppeteer
Click on link above

Friday, March 7, 2014

The Ripple Effect

I threw a small stone into the lake, it made some ripples.  Cool
I threw a larger stone into the lake. It made even more ripples.  Cooler
I threw a really huge stone into the lake.  It made really made a lot of big ripple waves.  Awesome.
I was drinking Ripple wine at the time, thus the Ripple Effect.

Friday, November 15, 2013

Best Quotes by a Comedian

Stepen Wright  "I think it's wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly."
                         "I saw a bank that said 24 Hour Banking, but i don't have that much time"
                         "I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they wouldn't    
                           have to go so fast."
                         "Change is inevitable ...except from vending machines"
                         "My theory on evolution is that Darwin was adopted."

Henny Youngman  "When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
                                "A doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so he 
                                  gave him another six months."

George Carlin  "I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where's the self-help section?' She
                           said it she told me, it would defeat the purpose."
                         "I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that 'I
                           do' is the longest."

David Letterman  "People say New Yorkers can't get along. Not true. I saw two New Yorkers,
                                perfect strangers sharing a taxi.  One guy took the radio and the tires and the
                                other guy took the engine."

Milton Berle  "A committee is a group that keeps minutes, but loses hours."
                       "You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think."

Joan Rivers  "Grandchildren can be annoying -- how many times can you go: "And the cow goes moo                          and the pig goes oink"? It's like talking to a supermodel."

Albert Einstein  "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has it's limits."



Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Shopping Mall Zombies

Remember those very old zombie movies that took place in the shopping malls.  If you look around in the large indoor malls, their still there, but now walking around looking for beads, trinkets, jewelry, shoes.  They've progressed and no longer hunger to eat human flesh and have all had cosmetic surgery done so they look like us.  They still move slow though.
Years ago the zombies used to follow the blue flashing lights inside of a large department store, but when that store  stopped their blue light specials, for a short time the zombies could be seen on the streets trying to chase police cars with their sirens and flashing lights on.  After a while they gave up and returned back to the large indoor shopping malls.

Saturday, April 6, 2013


There is an exclusive secret by invitation only meeting once a year by the Bilderberg Group where important people around the world meet.  They are the ones who control the world's destiny.  When Bill Clinton was then the governor of Arkansas , he was invited and attended.  A while later he became our President.
I keep waiting for my invitation to that meeting, but all I ever get is Publisher Clearing House notices that I may have won millions of dollars. 
However, I was invited and did attend a meeting and reunion of Vietnam veterans of the second platoon.  We discussed world situations, problems and solutions and what was the best brand of beer.  Fat tire got my vote, but don't believe anything we said or did there changed the world's destiny.  Except to increase the sales of fat tire beer.
(update 6-08-2013 This years Bilderberg meeting)

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Bloggers & Cloggers Annual Meeting

     The International Association of Bloggers & Cloggers held this year's annual meeting yesterday at Maple Lanes Bowling Alleys.  There was no bowling during the meeting.
     The cloggers objected to the fact they were forced to wear bowling shoes, so the event was a lot quieter this year.

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Golf Game

Moses, Jesus, and God were playing a round of golf.
Moses teed off first and his ball went into the water, but the waters parted and the ball rolled to about two feet away from the hole. 
Jesus teed off next and his ball too hit the water, but it skipped on top of the water and ended up about one foot away from the hole.
God then teed off and his ball hit a tree and was stuck between two branches.  A squirrel grabbed the ball and immediately an eagle swooped down and grabbed the squirrel and flew towards the hole with the squirrel still holding onto the golf ball.  When the eagle was a few feet above the hole a very small bolt of lightening hit the eagle and squirrel.  The ball then dropped into the hole and the eagle flew away and the squirrel ran back to the tree.
Jesus turned to God and said "Nice shot Dad"

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

The Guru

The young man struggled as he climbed toward the mountain peak.  He stopped to catch his breath  and glanced upward .  He had been told that a wise man lived on that peak.
Later after much effort he finally achieved his goal and was rewarded by the sight of a guru sitting on the ground in meditation.
"How do I attain success and happiness" asked the young man.
"Success comes from wanting and happiness comes from not wanting" was the guru's answer.

Monday, October 15, 2012

The Abyss

     The old man stood at the rocky edge of the bottomless abyss.  It was only about 8 feet in diameter.  He looked down and saw a faint reddish orange glow from it's great depths.  He looked up and around and saw nothing for everything was in total darkness.  He listened but only heard silence, but he could smell the slight odor of sulfur fumes.  He could not remember how he got there or anything else.                                               Suddenly there was a loud whooshing sound and he felt heat on his face, he quickly glanced down and saw the faint glow turning into a quickly brightening  reddish orange light.  It was traveling upwards toward him at such a high speed that his face became so hot that he had to step back.  A couple minutes later he had backed about 30 feet away from the edge of the abyss to escape the intense heat.
     The old man was now bathe in a reddish light and could see that he was standing on smooth rock ground which was all he could see, where ever he looked,  except for the abyss for now it was filled with boiling lava and floating a few feet above the lava was an entity that looked like a frail short middle aged man with a receding hairline, who was wearing a  bow tie and holding a trident pitchfork in his hand.
    "What brings you here old man?"  the floater asked in a quiet voice.  " I don't know how I got here or what I'm doing here" was the reply.
    "Well let me clear things up for you, first I am Satan and have no idea of who you are or how you got here.  Let me tell you I have enough problems in hell without having to spend time here.  Do you know that there is a problem with overcrowding now.  When I first submerged to the depths of hell to escape the hands of God, I thought this is the perfect place, I can enjoy myself here.  I didn't think about it's limited space.  Heaven doesn't have that problem because it's infinite.  Also there are not many skilled craftsmen in hell and those that are don't give a damn.  So Hell is falling apart, nothing gets fixed." complained Satan.
"You know I used to have fun bossing people around before, now there are so many former dictators in hell who all think they are running the show that nobody listens to me anymore.  Look I've got some plumbing problems I have to finish fixing, so I've got to go."  Satan then descended back into the bottom of the abyss.
    Then the old man awoke from his dream.